How Do I Know if My Feelings Are Rational Or Irrational?

Dear Christina,

I’ve heard you talk before about how our feelings can either be rational or irrational and the way you describe it makes so much sense. I’ve never heard someone describe it like you do. Can you describe it again so that I can really get it? It was so helpful to me the first time I heard you say it.

-Justin

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Dear Justin,

Hi! Thanks for writing in. I would love to explain what I mean when I say that our feelings can either be rational or irrational. 

 This is one of my favorite topics and I absolutely LOVE how quickly it changes people’s lives and relationships when they embrace and use the methodology I teach.

Because my methodology and tools are so unique, I thought it would be best if I recorded you a video because it allows me to be really descriptive and clear. In the video I not only give a lot of really powerful examples, but I give you a powerful self-assessment tool (or two) to use when you’re having big feelings and trying to determine if what you’re feeling is real or if you’re viewing things through the distorted lens of pain.

I believe I say this multiple times in the video, but it’s worth repeating here: Pain distorts EVERYTHING. We can never trust what we’re about to say or do when we are feeling lit up about something, triggered, or feeling big negative feelings. We must implement the Power of the Pause, which is the term I coined to help us all remember that there’s power in not allowing ourselves to react immediately and there’s power in sourcing the pain that we’re feeling and not projecting it out onto someone or something.

If we want to be in control of ourselves, our lives, and change our experiences we MUST learn how to implement the self-assessment strategy I teach in the video and we must be able to accept responsibility for who we are and what we’re feeling — rational or irrational — because that’s the only way we can clear all the pain that is in the way of us living the life of our dreams.

When you watch the video, you’ll see what I’m talking about and you’ll clearly understand why it’s so unbelievably important.

I hope this response is helpful to you. Thank you again for asking me to reiterate my position on rational and irrational feelings. 

 If there’s ever a specific situation you’re going through that you could use help with, send me a note here. I’d love to help more.

With love, gratitude, grit, and grace,